How To Make The Perfect Tuna “Mayo” Sandwich.

It has come to my attention that not many of us eat breakfast OR do not deem it important enough to label it as an official “meal” of the common day. What if I was to tell you that breakfast is the “most important meal of the day” ?

Studies show that children who eat breakfast do better in school. It doesn’t take much further thought to know that adults will feel better and perform better at work as well. Whether you work at home, on the farm, at the office, at school, or on the road, it is not a good idea to skip breakfast.

Source:nutrition.about.com

No Wonder Why You Are Spending 5 Years at a 2 Year College Course.

if we skip breakfast, we are likely to become tired when our brains and bodies run low on fuel. By mid-morning, a lot of us grab a cup of coffee or wolf down a sugary candy bar to wake up again. This might work for a few minutes, but by lunch time we are hungry, crabby, and perhaps our mood might make us a little more prone to making unhealthy choices at lunch. Eating a good breakfast sets the tone for the rest of the day…..Kellogs

I’m sure most of you eat cornflakes at some point during the day or at least once a week therefore meaning you must have seen the advertisements they have running all over the container it comes in. The message of “Eat Kellogs for a Good Start To the Day” has literally been etched to every single container/box of every produce they make including them stupid snack bars.

So is it right? Eat a Kellog’s produce for a Good Start To the Day ?

Its not about eating Kellogs specifically during the morning its all about having something in the morning as long as it is more than sugar.

I managed to get out of college in two years, should I tell you how? Have a nice Tuna Mayo Sandwich in the morning. Seeing as your struggling with your studies i”ll even go ahead and teach you how to make the most perfect form of Tuna Sandwich; Courtesy of the H2G2 BBC.

Preparing Your Sandwich

You will need:

Mixing bowl and fork/spoon to mix (optional)

Can opener, if you have an old-style can of tuna (optional)

Margarine, butter or similar spread (optional)

Knife or spatula, for spreading

Knife, a nice sharp one, for cutting bread

Sweetcorn and/or salad (optional)

Seasoning, to taste

Clingfilm, greaseproof paper or sandwich bag, if you don’t intend to eat the sandwich straightaway (optional)

If you have yet not figured out you need Bread, Tuna & Mayonnaise from the title your a lost case or more likely a RETARD (click on retard)

Now for the easy bit:

Mix tuna, mayonnaise and other ingredients (to taste), as appropriate

Place a slice of bread down on a cutting board (or a surface you don’t mind potentially slicing into with a sharp knife

Spread a thin layer of margarine or butter on to bread (optional)

Slather your mayonnaise and tuna mixture on to the bread (or layer the ingredients, if not pre-mixed)

Add salad and/or sweetcorn, if desired (unless you already mixed sweetcorn into the mix)

Fold over bread (if using only one slice) or place another slice of bread on top (if using more than one slice)

Cut sandwich (optional)

If using the two-slice method you may wish to cut your sandwich in half, into triangles or rectangles, depending on preference. Some sandwich eaters prefer to cut their sandwiches into quarters, creating smaller triangles, or squares. When offering sandwiches to children or elderly people it may be best to cut them into smaller portions. When offering to a complete retard its best to put the sandwich in mixer with a little bit of water until it has become more or less liquid. Then you add the now liquid sandwich to a bottle (baby bottle) and let him/her drink from there. Be careful though, sometimes the retard will not know what to do with the bottle- IT is NOT as intelligent as a baby who has common sense.

Can You Beat Mine?

I like mine with a glass of apple juice. Bon Appetit! (means enjoy your meal you moron.)

Fanmail? Hatemail? Contact Me.

Related Ads:

One Response to “How To Make The Perfect Tuna “Mayo” Sandwich.”

1. The True Xaasid Returns | Xaasid Dot Com Says:
   September 17th, 2008 at 2:06 pm

   [...] How To Make The Perfect Tuna “Mayo” Sandwich [...]